Friendships = Relationships

•September 16, 2009 • Leave a Comment

I can’t say that I have any experience in relationships, dating, fucking, kissing, giving head and all that jazz. But I do know a lot about friendship. And recently, I got to witness 3 strong friendships disintegrate, and, you know, it’s messy. Friendships are something you start with no intention of ending it; sometimes you lose touch, or grow apart, but a pure decision to end it… I just don’t understand.

I’ve been friends with people I’ve liked and/or dated before, and I admit that it gets messy.. really fucking messy. But, after this summer, which has shocked me and taught me many things I truly thought were impossible; I can honestly say that I was wrong, and I love to be wrong about stuff like this.

First of all, friendship between male and female is possible; completely platonic and just pure being there for each other in times of need. Possible. I can guarantee that I can pass the shower test.

Second of all, friendship with someone you used to like is possible, too; to be friends with someone without expecting more. Check. Can I guarantee passing the shower test? No, but the trick is to limit encounters.

Third of all, friendship with someone you used to be really close with. Well, what can I say? Still working on that.

Before this summer, I always thought that one and two were impossible, but now I truly believe that I can be friends with just about anybody. And anyway, to rule them out of your life, as time goes on, you will only realize that it actually hurts more than to leave them be. No matter how much you hate their guts, orhow hard it is to be around them; in the end, you leave little pieces of yourself with everyone you meet. To ban someone from your life is to deny yourself a part of you; how can you be whole if the puzzle is missing a piece?

I have to admit that I still have a list of people that I do not want in my life, but, hell, I am slowly chipping away at it. I’ve even forgiven my dad after all these years. Everything is possible.

Everything is possible.

hindsight + future = present

•September 6, 2009 • Leave a Comment

My whole life seems to have finally fallen perfectly into places. My whole life, which always seemed like a perpetual wasteful, circular parade of failures seems to finally add up one by one and have an end result.

Why have I spent so much time regretting my choices, and decisions? I made them and I stand by them, and, in the end, it was the right thing to do. I should launch on forward, and never look back.

I love forgiveness, and redemption, and resilience, and how they can just make everything alright in the end. I’ve spent so much time feeling guilty. Ah, what a fucken waste of time. 2009 is really a year of discovery, challenge, victory, conquest and freedom.

randomosities

•August 24, 2009 • 2 Comments

I have been in a state of shocked stupor, close to comatose, largely lethargic. My brain was fully on automatic… I guess I didn’t realize until later that I had been slightly depressed this week, and spent all of my free time rotting away at a cinema crying at any given moment.

Highlight movie: Julie & Julia. It made me wanna learn how to cook, and start it all off with boeuf bourguignon. I was always in love with baking (which I stopped quite some time ago) but until now, I never realized how much fun cooking could actually be.

Yesterday, KK and I went to MF’s where the boy sang, played the piano, electric and acoustic guitar until my head was spinning round and round. For the first time in years, I took the guitar in my hand and played whatever I could remember.. which was basically Metallica’s Nothing Else Matters (HAHAHAHA) and Nirvana’s Come As You Are (which was the first song I ever learned). So I went out and bought a Yahama acoustic guitar which came with a kit that had a (shitty) guitar bag, a pitch-pipe (a funny-looking blow-tuner thing), a string winder (a thing to facilitate my changing strings), a pack of bronze strings, 3 shiny picks, a strap and a fucking capo! That was absolutely sick. I just touched it and it sounded so good (no, I didn’t actually try it out in store, I just picked the cheapest thing :P).

MF finally passed me the Dimelo Tu book, so I can actually get on with learning Spanish. After reading the first lesson today, I realized I actually remembered more than I gave myself credit for.

After work today, I went to Indigo to buy Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking (but of course, it was sold out) and I ended up leaving with a psychological astrology book, a Spanish dictionary, and a Chinese characters books with all the 800 characters I would need to pass the first level in the HSK (the Chinese Proficiency Test). I’m gonna either take a Korean class this semester, or audit a bunch of Spanish classes at Concordia. I have to start getting my life together. Graduation is coming in… way too fast.

So here I am, trying to perfect my Mandarin, trying to continue learning Spanish and guitar, and trying to take on Korean. I have the tendency to be too ambitious.

Songs to re-learn and learn:
Stage Fright’s Cocaine Girl
Led Zeppelin’s Stairway To Heaven
a Beatles’ song?
Nirvana’s Smells Like Teen Spirit
Jewel’s You Were Meant For Me
The White Stripes’ Seven Nation Army
Dashboard Confessional’s… anything on TPYHCTFTM
Hole’s Gold Dust Woman
RENT’s Your Eyes

2 year anniversary!

•August 10, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Hard to imagine that I’ve had this blog for two years. I started it shortly after I started working at Starbucks. I befriended Michelle on FB and saw that she had a wordpress blog, so I decided to do the same. I think it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I’ve had a lot of blogs, journals and diaries… I used to be a pretty prolific writer (I guess… I used to find myself very interesting) but these days I have my moleskin notebook which holds just about everything like school notes, lists, random songwriting, drawings and pastiche of literary things… it is a companion to my life. Then I have this blog where I write more thought-out randomosities. My diaries would be useless to anybody these days because after college, they became more and more abstract and postmodern. I spent less time talking about uninteresting things I did, things other people did, and focused more on my emotional impressions of life. One of my old roommates read the diary I carried around at the time, and told me there was no substance to it. I read it over and all I see is an insecure control freak who talks about Quiznos all the time.

Over time, I’ve deleted a lot of entries in this blog. Some I thought were outdated, embarrassing and too confessional. Some, just because I didn’t wanna remember. I keep this blog as a reminder of how I felt and some of the lists here are interesting to expand upon. So many idea and so little time, but I hope this blog will stick by me for the years to come.

How have I changed in the past 2 years? I let less things get to me. I don’t hang on to the past as much. I am less angry, less dramatic, more philosophical and less self-centered, less self-conscious. More open-minded but also more weary… and I learned Chinese! (kinda…) Isabelle has grown up and matured, whoda thunk?

I can honestly say that with each day that goes by I am becoming more and more the person I always wanted to be.

Sang Real

•August 1, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Many would agree that Summer ‘09 was the best ever. This year even beats last year at being amazing; I can only imagine what next year has in store.

I met so many amazing people this summer and had so much fun. Joining Bananaship was a huge part of it; it was a constant nonstop party with no alcohol. Thank you, Sheldon, for always giving us rides. This summer I decided to reinvent myself and do all kinds of things I wouldn’t do; I think the constant challenge made it all the more interesting.

Summer ‘09:
-buying and wearing summer dresses
-K. Ellwood and J. Wilson in the same class
-routine nature bagel + cream cheese… are you sure?
-buying liquid eyeliner and touching the wrong person
-Festival time… Candy’s mini sandwiches, competing in the rain
-being Mrs. Kwan for the BBQ
-trick candle for Tak’s surprise birthday
-rapping in Korean at Pang Pang
-Banafa/Bananaship reservations
-short shorts and no-pants jokes
-crying during movies on Cheap Tuesdays
-The Morning jokes
-Train Station talks
-pool night at Fats
-rehearsing under the highway with M.Farrell
-assisting everyone in their love adventures
-sushi/Peel Pub with Roxci before she left
-planning Vancouver next year
-quitting smoking with Prime Time
-ice cream run at the Korean/Jap store
-BANG! Kill the Sheriff!
-Bandeau dress from AA
-my awesome Lollipops bag for 150 instead of 400
-watching HIST 262 lectures and taking good notes
-Scores after practice
-Phil’s obsession with iced chrysanthemum tea
-fitting too many people in cars
-heart and sperm fireworks
-fireworks at Merica’s
-bagging sessions
-Chin Chin during the Jazz Fest
-Cine Express
-grocery shopping with Denise
-mass convos on MSN
-sea salt baths
-2A at Vie&Nam…
-Ze and Tony’s triangular hair at MIDBRF
-Merica’s different sayings: over 9000!!!, eille!, where’s the pickle?
-singing the graduation song on Jenny’s last BS day
-fitting too many people in restaurants (and almost causing a suicide at Wing’s)
-Project B, Plan B, Right Heavy playing 7 Nation Army, Yellow and Bleed It Out
-incest/pedophilia jokes
-Michael Jackson = Michael Jordan?
-WHO BREAKS PADDLES!?… GIMME A B!… THIS SHIP IS BANANAS!
-opera/Chicago
-McFlurry!
-broken telephone at Palais Orientale
-Phil’s How To Seduce The Ladies By Eating Crab in Public
-Indian Buffet Oregano
-Steph’s hello…
-Mike/Mike jokes
-Beaver Lake’s brothel
-getting a bunch of EPs from Cheap Thrills or the return of the VICE magazine at Starbucks
-3 SM + 2 DMs
-Gavin Rossdale / Blue October
-Maria’s welcome back party
-”I just lost the game”
-AB, MV, KK getting their ears pierced
-Strip BIG2… lol, that never happened
-New Moon trailer… kiss me!
-reading The Unbearable Lightness of Being and The Host
-The Proposal, Millenium, 6 Years in Love…
-finding out that friendship between man and woman isn’t so impossible after all
-mm pap smear

They say that the way you spend New Year’s forecasts the upcoming year; I would say that it’s entirely right. As much as I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing this summer; I feel so fulfilled. SUMMER ‘09 was the summer of girly, sporty and self-confident Isabelle.

SOUNDTRACK:
-Linkin Park – In The End
-Big Bang – Lies
-Kate Tucker – Faster Than Cars Drive
-The All-American Rejects – Another Heart Calls
-Silversun Pickups – Draining
-The Pussycat Dolls – Jai Ho
-Fightstar – Palahniuk’s Laughter
-Stream of Passion – Open Your Eyes
-alexisonfire – This Could Be Anywhere In The World
-Wheesung – Insomnia

bleed it out

•July 20, 2009 • Leave a Comment

sometimes, you need to make a choice and not look back. it’s easy for me to make decisions for myself, at work or with friends. when it comes to the matter of the heart, it isn’t my decision anymore. to be in a relationship is to give up a part of yourself to become a part of someone else. you both start becoming someone else while remaining you – this works in both friendship and love. i try to surround myself with the best entourage i can find and i can honestly say that some people i met have deeply marked me and changed me.

in no particular order:
kk: i’ve always admired her loyalty and faithfulness towards her friends. so much love and passion; i can honestly say that she’s taken many emotional bullets for me during the past 10 years. i came from pretty dark teenage days; she saved me from loneliness and slowly taught me the meaning of being a good friend. we’ve gone through everything together – the good, the bad, the ugly, the terrible, the garbage, the vomit (we’ve had our share of terrible times – or rather, I’ve made a lot of mistakes and unconsciously dragged her into it). jealousy? yes. you know, if you’re reading this, there was a time when you didn’t like assholes. i remember because i’ve liked them, too…

adi: growing in an asian family with strong chinese roots, i was born and raised to be an unemotional person. adi, as a free spirit, showed me her way to freedom and i learned a lot. we spent about two years doing everything together because we had the same classes. i grew to be a huge hugger, spent more time in nature and getting in touch with my motherly side. i haven’t heard or seen her in years, though we’ve gone through some bad times, i try to remember only the good.

pl: what can i say about the huge vortex that was PL? i’ve always loved music, but pl had really cemented and changed my way of appreciating music. meeting pl made me get my driver’s licence, changed my wardrobe to band shirts and hoodies, decide to get 13 ear piercings (i don’t really know if I’ll really get 13 since i’m only at 5 and I’m running out of places), started my converse shoes trend. meeting pl has made me randomer, friendlier, louder and hellbent on saving everybody’s day one smile at a time. the end of pl has made me start a no-bullshit policy, which i’ve faithfully followed for the past few years.

pae: pae has definitely affected my life. with him, i started my “no shitting where i eat” policy where i have just recently broke (and regret? not yet. there are some things i deal with by avoiding, but this is something i should deal with head on because when it does work, it’s a wonderful feeling). with him, i learned how to be a better leader… there are a lot of things he’s enforced, there are a lot of things he’s created (like a fear of rich people). though, he’s affected my life during the past three years. i’ve slowly realized that the world doesn’t exist that way, and that i just managed to meet all the right people to fuck me up perfectly.

lt: with L, I remembered a lot of things that I forgot… like the fact that I loved museums, that I am Chinese no matter where my mother was born but that I was undeniably Quebecois, too. I learned to be calmer and more forgiving towards my past. as everyone i met in the past slowly ruined me, he brightened up my future pathway, making it smell of honeysuckle and sandalwood ([edit] come to think of it, it smells more like A&F). i look to the past as a part of myself, and view the future as an exciting unknown. I don’t know how to view this, if he had to fix me for the (wo)men to come, or if it were supposed to end with him. everything i thought i wasn’t capable of, as days went on, i slowly realize that i criminally underestimated myself. he sees me for who i will be, but he doesn’t realize that i am not her yet. as i run to become this amazing person he thinks i am, i find myself highly disappointed in my inadequacy. “aime-toi,” he used to say all the time. yes, but, why don’t you start with yourself?

zwz: probably she would be surprised to hear this, but meeting her had made me more accepting and aware of the business aspect of life. her shameless happiness made me realize that enthusiasm could also be a tool in making people’s live better, not just hugs, 3am talks and smiles.

dw: daniel wong. big brother. however you wanna call him. i cannot deny that he was a big mentor in my life. just watching him live in such a typically chinese way made me realize how life can be, how life should be and how life is lived by people who are money-smart. i wish i had the energy to live as he does, but i have always wanted other things out of life. i cannot write a book if i have to constantly worry about the stock market. i chose ignorance to increase my chances at finding inspiration.

i always found laughing to be important. having spent most of my teenage years stressing out over the most embarrassingly insignificant details, i realized that life shouldn’t be taken too seriously. laugh because you can! laugh because life is funny; life is fragile and absurd and trying to change that is funny. people have told me that my laugh makes them laugh; i don’t hear myself laugh and i can’t see the impact of my laughter on others. my laughing is more of a response to someone tickling my cerebral bone than actual laughing. laughing isn’t the key to my heart, food isn’t the key to my heart, music is close, but what really wins me over is someone who can make my heart smile; someone who can make me feel something in my dead, hollow heart.

everyone has taken a piece of me, and by meeting them again, i found pieces of myself that i didn’t know i’d lost. call it cheap time travelling. but every person has brought me a piece that completes the puzzle of me finding myself, and this is what my life has been about so far; to find out who I am and how I can use that to help others.

this year, i decided to go through an isabellian revolution. “change without the e”? eff that! I’ll be ‘is a belle change’. Isabelle defies her car accident by wearing short shorts, skirts and dresses. Isabelle defies her bad grades in gym class by joining a dragonboat team. Isabelle defies her lack of Asian friends by befriending all the ones on her dboating team. Isabelle defies her sister’s horror stories about wearing flip flops by wearing them outside of practice. Isabelle defies her history of short hair by growing it. Isabelle defies her neck allergies by wearing scarves. Isabelle defies her comfort zone by not wearing hoodies. Isabelle defies her lack of femininity and lack of male friends. Isabelle defies her past to rebuild herself from scratch.

I admit that I know nothing. I have my ever-evolving set of opinions and I am always ready to be proven wrong. Ultimately, I have no opinion therefore I don’t like giving them out.

Isabelle’s cheap eats and more

•July 13, 2009 • Leave a Comment

1-3$ range
-buns in Chinatown (my preference: Jardin de Jade)
-instant noodles from the Korean & Japanese grocery store
-fries @ Vanelli’s
-fried chicken @ IGA, Provigo…
-steamés @ La Belle Province
-cream cheese bagel @ Timmies
-sammies @ Quiznos
-pizza slices @Al-Taïb, Pizza Bella…

3-5$ range
-all-dressed half and half with garlic @ Al-Taib
-wakame salad @ sushi places
-mini soup at Thai Express
-banh mi @Vie&Nam….
-half total pizza @ Quiznos
-poutine @ Sipan
-gyro @ Souvlaki George
-small 2-choices of salad @ Culture’s

food obsession for under 5$
-red bean ice cream
-red bull
-zero sprite
-kolbosa
-fries with mayo

5-10$
-garlic and pepper squid @ Bangkok
-roasted anything @ Coco Rico Rotisserie
-the everything pho @ Pho Lien
-sandwiches @ Art Java
-duck something soup @ Doby & Andy
-Quiznos: veggie, garlic prime rib, turkey ranch swiss…

10-20$
-fried calamari @ Le Jardin de Panos
-Lao Beijing
-Bulgogi House
-Amigo 168 in Chinatown

20+
-l’Aromate
-Odaki
-Little Fat Sheep